and the winner is...

Beautiful, exotic... MINNEAPOLIS!

That's right, folks-- we are spending this coming Saturday through Monday in the Land of 10,000 Lakes!  We chose Minneapolis for a few reasons, some of which include the fact that I've never been there, it's within driving distance, and the Blackhawks are playing the Wild on Saturday night.  This means I'll be going to my first ever NHL game... or really, my first ever ice hockey game of any type!

I'm pretty excited, because some of the best times J and I have with each other are when we travel.  We get to relax, be ourselves and let go of our every day stresses in a way that allows us to fully enjoy each other and our time together.  Celebrating two years together will make this road trip even sweeter!  We're also able to do it on the VERY cheap due to my bargain hunting skills and some saved up hotel credits.  We don't have a lot of money right now, but devoting the $250 or so we'd spend on gifts and dinner towards a short trip seemed like the right choice!

If any of my faithful readers have ever been to Minneapolis/St. Paul, do you have any recommendations?  We've read about the Juicy Lucy burger, are planning to see the Mall of America and hopefully the Northern Vineyards Winery.  Any food or sight tips?  I'd love to squeeze in the Minneapolis Institute of Art on Sunday, since they're closed Monday!  I'm also pretty excited that we'll be able to stop at Sonic on the way up, and Sobelman's in Milwaukee on the way back.  That's right-- food choice helped dictate our path of travel!

Besides that, it was a pretty great weekend around our house.  We ran errands on Saturday, then spend the rest of the weekend being lazy and enjoying a free weekend.  I also was quite the chef, taking advantage of having actual time and ingredients at home to make great meals from!  I whipped up two of J's favorite: my homemade knockoff of Panera's chicken salad and the Pioneer Woman's AMAZING drip beef.  I also threw together a loaf of my favorite simple banana bread, made even more delicious with the addition of walnuts and dark chocolate chips... mmmm, so good!

xoxo,
e

sweat the small stuff.

living together has been an adjustment on many levels: space, personal time, tv preferences, weekend plans... all take on new meaning when living with the one you love.  however, i greatly underestimated the impact of all the small things (cue the blink 182 here, please).

small things make a big impact, and not in that cheesy "make someone else's day brighter" way.  rather, in a "i swear to bejesus if XYZ happens one more time, i'm flipping the coffee table over and punching a hole in the wall" kind of way.

what are these small things that turn into such nightmares?  a few examples, from both sides of the bed...

her list

• his leaving TV shows on the DVR for six months, never having even attempted a viewing
• his leaving water/toothpaste remnants/hair gel remnants ALL OVER the bathroom sink - nothing says good morning like putting your hand in a giant puddle of mystery goop at 6:45am
• his refusal to eat bread or drink milk nearing (not even past) its expiration date
• his insistence upon leaving the bathroom door shut when in the shower
• his inability to fall asleep without the TV on

his list

• her leaving her hair straightener on the sink after finishing getting ready
• her required shower curtain, even though we have a shower door
• her laundry, because there's so damn much of it all the time
• her inability to decide on where/what to eat for dinner, EVERY DAY
• her insistence that i take my glasses off when i go to sleep at night

now that we KNOW these things about each other, i'd like to think we make a concerted effort to be a little less annoying... but still, these things still pop up every week.  if he weren't so damn cute, i'd have electrocuted him in the aforementioned sink puddle with the hair straightener that i (try not to) forget to put away sometimes.

so... what are the small things in your relationship that make a big difference?  mountains from molehills and dunes from grains of sand... let me have 'em!

the anniversary issue.

It's hard to believe.

At the end of October (literally, the last day of the month, aka Halloween), J and I will celebrate two years together!  This is a monumental occasion for the both of us, after reviewing some key facts...

• Neither of us had ever been in a relationship that lasted much beyond a year.
• We've never lived with a partner before each other.
• One in ten relationships founded online don't last beyond a month.
• We have quite opposite tastes in... everything (food, TV, temperature, social situations, etc...).
• We have poor luck separately, but combined, I'm pretty sure in past lives we were responsible for the sinking of the Titanic, WWI and Thalidomide.  When we get married, we may change our last name to Murphy, since his law seems so prevalent in our lives.

Despite a lion's share working against us... we've made it.  So, how to celebrate?

We have the possibility of going to Las Vegas, but times are tight.  Although we'd only have to pay for a portion of the trip thanks to some flight vouchers and a generous friend who J would do some side work for, we aren't sure if we should stick close to home and save the money for holidays or other travels.  We also recognize the fact that we aren't married and don't need to celebrate every dating-versary like it's such a huge deal, but this just feels big.

So, friends... ideas for how to celebrate?  Cognizant of the fact that it is Halloween weekend?  Thinking of maybe exploring the wilds of Wisconsin, traveling to Michigan to see the lake from the other side, or back to Milwaukee for another brewery tour, some gambling and a damn fine burger at Sobelman's.  That is, unless you have something better in mind?

and then, life took over.

wow.  i can't believe i haven't blogged in over 10 months.  my bad, y'alls.  not that too many "outsiders" read this thing, but if anyone was worrying, J and i are still together!  bet you thought we broke up and this whole thing became obsolete, eh?  NO SUCH LUCK, INTERNETS.

what did happen, though, was life.  working in higher education, my life is always neatly incremented into semester divisions, wherein every month brings a new set of challenges.  i've been at my current institution for four years as of july, which both seems like entirely too long and fairly short.  however, the whispers of change have been floating in my head more and more recently, and i've decided to casually job search.  i am constantly working, whether in the office, at home or on weekends, as is the nature of what i do.  J is unhappy in his current job and the demands of his stressful work and hours (12 hour days, 5 days a week plus he's on call all the time) have been a big source of contention in our relationship.  having two people looking for new jobs is stressful enough, but working out the finance and geographic logistics is even more difficult.  add to that the possibility of J returning to school to finish his degree and my desire to work less insane hours, and it's madness.  one day at a time, folks... something lindsay lohan clearly never learned.

on the upside, we've made some fantastic memories over the last ten months as well.  our first holiday together with my family went well; my family welcomed J with open arms and we even got to spend some alone time exploring my hometown together.  in february, we went snow tubing in wisconsin for my birthday and had a great time.  we did a whirlwind tour of the US in june, traveling to atlanta to see two of my college friends get hitched, then on to las vegas for some gambling fun and phoenix to catch a diamondbacks game at chase field.  most recently, over labor day weekend, we traveled to washington, dc for J's birthday.  we took in both an orioles and a nationals game, and took my 2 year old nephew to the national zoo for a (very hot) day.  without our traveling lately, i think we'd be two rather ugly people... our trips have been constant sources of fun and milemarkers along the way when we've been terribly stressed.

in closing, i promise to update more often!  with my recent discovery of google reader, i'm finding a renewed interest in blogging.  keep me on my toes, folks!

hakuna matata,
e

all i want for christmas.

the holidays are always a good/bad time of year.  personally, i LOVE this season, despite the fact that my mom pretty much hates the holidays and has been sort of a scrooge since i was in high school.  however, i do my best to make it merry every year, by insisting on family time, decorations and home-cooked food.  it usually works out, but there is almost always one point every year where mom ends up locking herself in her room and/or getting pissed at the entire family for some reason.  thankfully with liam around, she's less inclined to be so dramatic so that the poor kid can enjoy his first few christmases.

now, J seems to be on the same page as my mom in regards to the holiday season.  he'd be content to work like it was a normal day and forego any family time, celebrations or festivities.  however... the holidays are special to me.

when most girls are young, they dream of their wedding day and all the amazing things and special moments encompassed by the event.  but, when i was little, i always dreamed of holidays with my family, including husband and children.  i don't know why, but that image means a lot to me.  once i found J, i was excited at the prospect of making the dream come true.

last year, we'd only been together about 2 months at christmas.  it wasn't a huge deal, but it was the first exchange of gifts for us.  i spent two weeks in virginia with my family and J stayed here, where he worked and bummed around.  i think he was pretty happy with the arrangment.

this year, however...

J is privy to christmas with my family!  i'll be home for 12 days, and he'll join us for 3 of those days.  the decision wasn't the problem, but the timing of everything was.  that, and J made it clear on several occasions how he was only taking part in the plan for me.  which, i will admit, is very nice, but... is it so much to ask for a little holiday spirit?

in the end, after a long conversation, i think J realized that how much this meant to me.  because truly, all i want for christmas IS him.  no matter the drama, no matter casseroles and awkward gift giving... it's about being with who you love and making a memory.  and that, we will do.

to be young, unlucky and in love: the moving day saga.

i moved in with J on june 14, 2009.  we planned everything in advance; arranged movers, rented a UHaul, took time off from work, scheduled new furniture to be delivered... in the end, it turns out, NONE OF THAT MATTERED.  ladies and gents, i present to you: the worst moving experience EVER.

friday, 7am: wake up to what the news is dubbing "the biggest weather event day of the year". we're expecting 4 inches of rain, horrible severe storms, flying cows, etc. have the patented very bad feeling in my stomach.

friday, 1230pm: leave work to go home, pack last minute items and such. my usual 20 minute commute takes me 1hr, 45mins because 4 of the exits of lakeshore drive are closed due to flooding.

friday, 215pm: arrive home to my street covered in a foot of water and no electricity. run around like mad for 45 minutes shoving things into boxes and bags, sweating to death because its 90 degrees with 90% humidity and the a/c and fan don't work since there's no power.  marvel at my mad dash skills.

friday, 3pm: leave home to pick up dry cleaning for funeral on saturday, pick up J from work and get uhaul. call movers and leave message making sure everything is ok, checking to see if they need directions.

friday, 4pm: arrive at J's work. he's running late, which (always) enrages me. we have movers coming at 6 and traffic is horrible b/c of the weather.

friday, 430pm: leave J's work 30 mins late.

friday, 445pm: wait in line for 15 mins, pick up uhaul.

friday, 5pm: J decides he needs to cash his paycheck and has to eat. also, he is in a horrible mood and i am stressed to the max.

friday, 520pm: start heading back to my place. traffic is redonk.

friday, 605pm: arrive back at my apartment. no word from movers. call and no answer.

friday, 607pm: check email on iphone. have an email from the movers timestamped at 557pm saying "the weather is pretty bad, we should probably reschedule."  AN EMAIL, REALLY?  THREE MINUTES BEFORE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO ARRIVE?  REALLY?!

friday, 608pm: flip out. MASSIVE PANIC. but, i am so upset and pissed off that i can't cry. J is astounded by this feat.

friday, 609pm: J and i commence calling movers, for a total of about 20 calls. leave numerous messages. no return calls.

friday, 620pm: call movinghelp.com, the service we used to hire movers. they attempt to contact the company with no success, either. they offer to help us find another company; the uhaul has to be back at 8am tomorrow and J is a pallbearer in a funeral at 930am. we can't prolong the process any more because we don't have time and i can't afford to indefinitely rent a uhaul.

friday, 630pm: movinghelp.com finds new movers who can come out to help. they're more costly, but i don't care at this point.

friday, 815pm: new movers arrive. two kids who can't be over the age of 18. but, they're young and strong and start working hard from the get go.

friday, 915pm: truck loaded, pretty much everything is inside except the final cleaning supplies and hanging clothes, which i'll get later.

friday, 920pm: on the drive to our new place, i joke with J that it would be funny if the elevator was out or something happened because of the weather. he doesn't find it humorous at all.

friday, 940pm: turns out i am a psychic.  arrive at new place and turn into parking lot; run into MASS FUCKING CHAOS. two trees have fallen, crushed four cars. police and fire are there. people are EVERYWHERE. there's nowhere to park. also, THE POWER IS OUT. we live on the fourth floor. MASSIVE PANIC.

friday, 945pm: am able to back into a spot that sucks for unloading, but it is better than nothing.

friday, 946pm: open the uhaul. we're promptly confronted by an odd lady who brusquely asks "what are you doing here with a uhaul?" we explain that i'm moving in. she proceeds to raise hell, telling us she is with the condo association. apparently, moving is only allowed before 430 on weekdays. she's also miffed that she didn't know anyone was living in our unit. she then asks who i am, if i am related to J. back off, lady.

friday, 950pm: the guys start moving stuff inside, through the crowd of people and up four flights of dark, hot stairs.

friday, 1015pm: i'm still talking to the old lady, being as charming and friendly as i can. we establish a rapport and i think i've won her over. she apologizes for her initial 'tude and sympathizes with our bad day.

friday, 1115pm: everything is inside. i leave the guys to get everything upstairs and go gas up and drop off the uhaul.

friday, 1145pm: arrive home (with dinner!) to a hot, smelly, damp, dark apartment. for some reason, half the power is on (living room and half the bedroom), but not the a/c, SUCK.

saturday, 1245am: after a cool shower and food, go to bed. immediately pass the eff out.

saturday, 8am: wake up to shower again and get ready for funeral. J is impossible to get out of bed.

saturday, 9am: leave for funeral.

saturday, 930am: arrive at funeral... which turns out to be a wake, funeral and burial ALL AT ONCE. it is the longest, strangest service i have ever been to.

saturday, 130pm: finally leave the cemetary and get food. race back (but not really, because we're in traffic most of the time) to our place, as our new living room furniture is coming between 230-530.

saturday, 240pm: arrive at home. start moving stuff to its proper locations and unpacking a little.

saturday, 535pm: new furniture arrives at the last possible minute. true to luck, our brand new sofa has a fairly large worn spot on the left arm. have to make appointment to get it fixed.

saturday, 6pm: hop in car and drive J to dick's so he can get new football socks. drive to football game and drop him off.

saturday, 7pm: run to walmart to pick up a few things.

saturday, 8pm: go back and watch J's football game, wait for them to finish losing so we can go home.

saturday, 11pm: eat dinner.

sunday, 12am: arrive home.

sunday, 10am: wake up, pack up cargo van with our extra stuff.

sunday, 1pm: minor freak out because I DONT KNOW WHERE ANY OF MY STUFF IS AND IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE. takes me 30 minutes to get dressed because i can't find an appropriate shirt.

sunday, 245pm: arrive at J's dad's house and unload furniture and boxes.

sunday, 4pm: take J's dad to dinner for father's day.

sunday, 9pm: arrive home after traffic and dropping off the cargo van.

sunday, 10pm: spend an hour with my boyfriend that doesn't involve moving something, driving somewhere or figuring out how to pay for something.

monday, 8am: wake up, so glad i took the day off. spend all day moving things around and unpacking. get about 60% done; all that remains is the kitchen and clothes to hang.

but hey... i live with my boyfriend now. so, that's exciting. back in june, it felt like a nightmare... it would have been so much better (albeit less hilarious) IF everything possible that could go wrong didn't.

looking back, it's a funny story.  in the moment (well, momentS), i seriously questioned if these events were omens.  i mean, NOTHING should be that difficult.  in the end, it all worked out.  i like to think the crazy stuff that happened during remodel and move-in was all just a test... and i think we passed.  five months in to living together and we're doing great.  thank goodness.  i'm afraid to think of what's to come next time we move... more natural disasters?  severe bodily injury?  nuclear warfare?  ugh.

HGTV can suck it: the finale

painting ordeal mostly behind us (the kitchen still remains primed, yet unfinished to this day), it was time to move on to "smaller" projects like lights, cleaning and new furniture.  i'm using the term smaller loosely here because our past home improvement history should have warned us this would be no cakewalk either.  and if it were a cakewalk, i'd somehow burn the cake or drop it on the floor.  thats just how i roll.

we hired a professional company to come clean the carpets.  they were supposed to arrive at 2pm on a saturday.  true to customer-friendly fashion, they arrived prompltly at 535pm.  J needed to be somewhere at 7pm, meaning i would be left to spend time with the semi-sketchy carpet pros all by my lonesome.  all in all, they did a pretty good job, but no one warned us we wouldn't be able to put our furniture back down on the floor for 24 hours AND that we needed to keep the condo doors and windows open to help speed the drying process.  i spent a chilly night alone sitting on a plastic sheet, bundled up in a comforter, watching TV.  who said remodeling wasn't glamorous?  oh wait, i did.

next, we bought a new sofa and loveseat, to be delivered the day after i moved in.  again, in true customer-friendly fashion, the furniture arrived around 5pm, and we had to bolt to J's football game as soon as the furniture was (literally) wedged in the door.  ah yes... in order to fit the pieces in the doorway, we had to remove the door from its hinges, thus rousing our nosy, elderly neighbors from all sides of the building.  it was like baby jessica was stuck in a well; everyone has an opinon or criticism to offer, when really we just wanted them to STFU and go away.  after that drama, the furniture was in.  as soon as the plastic was removed, i, OF COURSE, found two blemishes in the microfiber.  they tried to tell me it wasn't a big deal, but i refused to be minimized.  this resulted in the eventual return of a furniture magic fairy who was able to fix the two marks.  five months later, of course, we HATE the furniture.  i guess its just another excuse to do more shopping next time we move.

all in all, i'm glad to report that we made it.  throughout our 4 month project, i joked several times that if we could make it through remodeling together without murdering each other, we were all set.  in actuality, it's been a great test.  lots of physical and emotional stress really brings out the best and worst in people, and as a couple, we got to see that in each other. 

as we close the HGTV fairytale, i'd like to say that i will NEVER EVER be a do-it-yourselfer again, unless i absolutely have to.  looking back, i'd much have rather dropped the cash to pay someone else to do it all while i watch DVR'd episodes of cheaters and cops.  time is money as they say, and in this realm, my time is better spent with joey greco and my money is better spent with a contractor.

but at least we can say we did it.  in our first place together.