rededication.

My sister (Pam @ The Finders Keeper) has recently begun blogging.  I am inspired by her daily dedication to post, even when working long days and managing my 3 year old handful-of-a-nephew!  In her honor, I'm rededicating myself to posting more often.

I'm trying to decide whether to do that here, or to use another blog I currently have for private use.  This blog was originally born out of adjusting to cohabitating-- but we're nearly two years into that journey at this point.  Is it time to refocus, or should I stick with it?  Anyone out there have any input?

I'll leave you with one of my favorite pictures of my aforementioned nephew, little Liam.  

a day for love.

happy valentine's day to all, near and far.  valentine's day has always been a favorite of mine-- the fact that i was single for a good majority of them never really bothered me.  when i was young, my parents always made sure we had a special day, and i so enjoyed getting cards and little gifts, especially from my dad!

now that i am a "taken woman", i've always made it a goal to NOT have an overly sappy valentine's day.  it's just not me, not us.  our first valentine's day together, we had dinner at superdawg drive-in and went to the movies to see "he's just not that into you."  last year, we tried the traditional route and went for a fancy dinner at morton's that cost way too much money, and we both hated it.  too much money, the food was terrible and we felt overly pressured to fit into the romantic vibe.

this year, we went to milwaukee for the weekend, with the intention of going snow tubing at sunburst mountain.  however, we woke up on saturday morning feeling lazy and opted for plan B instead.  we tried out glorioso brothers, an italian deli i'd been dying to try, and had made-to-order cannolis at peter sciortino's afterwards.  we crossed another brewery off our list, visiting mega-brewery miller and sampling some of their (well known) beers.  afterwards, a nice nap, a big dinner and a trip to the casino.  sunday, we slept late in our amazing king-sized suite at the hilton, grabbed lunch at sobelman's, our favorite burger place, and stopped to buy groceries before heading home.  although there was no overt romance or lovey-dovey deep eye staring, it was a much-needed break away from our home and everyday lives.

tonight, we'll most likely share a heart-shaped lou malnati's pizza, snuggle on the couch and catch up on the DVR.  this is the time in my life where i'm starting to realize that it's not really what you do to celebrate something, but it's who you're with.  and, as long as i'm with my valentine today, the rest is all just background.

happy valentine's day to you, and especially to my love.  enjoy the day!

Though I know I'll never lose affection,

For people and things that went before.

I know I'll often stop 

And think about them...

In my life I love you more.

and the winner is...

Beautiful, exotic... MINNEAPOLIS!

That's right, folks-- we are spending this coming Saturday through Monday in the Land of 10,000 Lakes!  We chose Minneapolis for a few reasons, some of which include the fact that I've never been there, it's within driving distance, and the Blackhawks are playing the Wild on Saturday night.  This means I'll be going to my first ever NHL game... or really, my first ever ice hockey game of any type!

I'm pretty excited, because some of the best times J and I have with each other are when we travel.  We get to relax, be ourselves and let go of our every day stresses in a way that allows us to fully enjoy each other and our time together.  Celebrating two years together will make this road trip even sweeter!  We're also able to do it on the VERY cheap due to my bargain hunting skills and some saved up hotel credits.  We don't have a lot of money right now, but devoting the $250 or so we'd spend on gifts and dinner towards a short trip seemed like the right choice!

If any of my faithful readers have ever been to Minneapolis/St. Paul, do you have any recommendations?  We've read about the Juicy Lucy burger, are planning to see the Mall of America and hopefully the Northern Vineyards Winery.  Any food or sight tips?  I'd love to squeeze in the Minneapolis Institute of Art on Sunday, since they're closed Monday!  I'm also pretty excited that we'll be able to stop at Sonic on the way up, and Sobelman's in Milwaukee on the way back.  That's right-- food choice helped dictate our path of travel!

Besides that, it was a pretty great weekend around our house.  We ran errands on Saturday, then spend the rest of the weekend being lazy and enjoying a free weekend.  I also was quite the chef, taking advantage of having actual time and ingredients at home to make great meals from!  I whipped up two of J's favorite: my homemade knockoff of Panera's chicken salad and the Pioneer Woman's AMAZING drip beef.  I also threw together a loaf of my favorite simple banana bread, made even more delicious with the addition of walnuts and dark chocolate chips... mmmm, so good!

xoxo,
e

sweat the small stuff.

living together has been an adjustment on many levels: space, personal time, tv preferences, weekend plans... all take on new meaning when living with the one you love.  however, i greatly underestimated the impact of all the small things (cue the blink 182 here, please).

small things make a big impact, and not in that cheesy "make someone else's day brighter" way.  rather, in a "i swear to bejesus if XYZ happens one more time, i'm flipping the coffee table over and punching a hole in the wall" kind of way.

what are these small things that turn into such nightmares?  a few examples, from both sides of the bed...

her list

• his leaving TV shows on the DVR for six months, never having even attempted a viewing
• his leaving water/toothpaste remnants/hair gel remnants ALL OVER the bathroom sink - nothing says good morning like putting your hand in a giant puddle of mystery goop at 6:45am
• his refusal to eat bread or drink milk nearing (not even past) its expiration date
• his insistence upon leaving the bathroom door shut when in the shower
• his inability to fall asleep without the TV on

his list

• her leaving her hair straightener on the sink after finishing getting ready
• her required shower curtain, even though we have a shower door
• her laundry, because there's so damn much of it all the time
• her inability to decide on where/what to eat for dinner, EVERY DAY
• her insistence that i take my glasses off when i go to sleep at night

now that we KNOW these things about each other, i'd like to think we make a concerted effort to be a little less annoying... but still, these things still pop up every week.  if he weren't so damn cute, i'd have electrocuted him in the aforementioned sink puddle with the hair straightener that i (try not to) forget to put away sometimes.

so... what are the small things in your relationship that make a big difference?  mountains from molehills and dunes from grains of sand... let me have 'em!

the anniversary issue.

It's hard to believe.

At the end of October (literally, the last day of the month, aka Halloween), J and I will celebrate two years together!  This is a monumental occasion for the both of us, after reviewing some key facts...

• Neither of us had ever been in a relationship that lasted much beyond a year.
• We've never lived with a partner before each other.
• One in ten relationships founded online don't last beyond a month.
• We have quite opposite tastes in... everything (food, TV, temperature, social situations, etc...).
• We have poor luck separately, but combined, I'm pretty sure in past lives we were responsible for the sinking of the Titanic, WWI and Thalidomide.  When we get married, we may change our last name to Murphy, since his law seems so prevalent in our lives.

Despite a lion's share working against us... we've made it.  So, how to celebrate?

We have the possibility of going to Las Vegas, but times are tight.  Although we'd only have to pay for a portion of the trip thanks to some flight vouchers and a generous friend who J would do some side work for, we aren't sure if we should stick close to home and save the money for holidays or other travels.  We also recognize the fact that we aren't married and don't need to celebrate every dating-versary like it's such a huge deal, but this just feels big.

So, friends... ideas for how to celebrate?  Cognizant of the fact that it is Halloween weekend?  Thinking of maybe exploring the wilds of Wisconsin, traveling to Michigan to see the lake from the other side, or back to Milwaukee for another brewery tour, some gambling and a damn fine burger at Sobelman's.  That is, unless you have something better in mind?

and then, life took over.

wow.  i can't believe i haven't blogged in over 10 months.  my bad, y'alls.  not that too many "outsiders" read this thing, but if anyone was worrying, J and i are still together!  bet you thought we broke up and this whole thing became obsolete, eh?  NO SUCH LUCK, INTERNETS.

what did happen, though, was life.  working in higher education, my life is always neatly incremented into semester divisions, wherein every month brings a new set of challenges.  i've been at my current institution for four years as of july, which both seems like entirely too long and fairly short.  however, the whispers of change have been floating in my head more and more recently, and i've decided to casually job search.  i am constantly working, whether in the office, at home or on weekends, as is the nature of what i do.  J is unhappy in his current job and the demands of his stressful work and hours (12 hour days, 5 days a week plus he's on call all the time) have been a big source of contention in our relationship.  having two people looking for new jobs is stressful enough, but working out the finance and geographic logistics is even more difficult.  add to that the possibility of J returning to school to finish his degree and my desire to work less insane hours, and it's madness.  one day at a time, folks... something lindsay lohan clearly never learned.

on the upside, we've made some fantastic memories over the last ten months as well.  our first holiday together with my family went well; my family welcomed J with open arms and we even got to spend some alone time exploring my hometown together.  in february, we went snow tubing in wisconsin for my birthday and had a great time.  we did a whirlwind tour of the US in june, traveling to atlanta to see two of my college friends get hitched, then on to las vegas for some gambling fun and phoenix to catch a diamondbacks game at chase field.  most recently, over labor day weekend, we traveled to washington, dc for J's birthday.  we took in both an orioles and a nationals game, and took my 2 year old nephew to the national zoo for a (very hot) day.  without our traveling lately, i think we'd be two rather ugly people... our trips have been constant sources of fun and milemarkers along the way when we've been terribly stressed.

in closing, i promise to update more often!  with my recent discovery of google reader, i'm finding a renewed interest in blogging.  keep me on my toes, folks!

hakuna matata,
e

all i want for christmas.

the holidays are always a good/bad time of year.  personally, i LOVE this season, despite the fact that my mom pretty much hates the holidays and has been sort of a scrooge since i was in high school.  however, i do my best to make it merry every year, by insisting on family time, decorations and home-cooked food.  it usually works out, but there is almost always one point every year where mom ends up locking herself in her room and/or getting pissed at the entire family for some reason.  thankfully with liam around, she's less inclined to be so dramatic so that the poor kid can enjoy his first few christmases.

now, J seems to be on the same page as my mom in regards to the holiday season.  he'd be content to work like it was a normal day and forego any family time, celebrations or festivities.  however... the holidays are special to me.

when most girls are young, they dream of their wedding day and all the amazing things and special moments encompassed by the event.  but, when i was little, i always dreamed of holidays with my family, including husband and children.  i don't know why, but that image means a lot to me.  once i found J, i was excited at the prospect of making the dream come true.

last year, we'd only been together about 2 months at christmas.  it wasn't a huge deal, but it was the first exchange of gifts for us.  i spent two weeks in virginia with my family and J stayed here, where he worked and bummed around.  i think he was pretty happy with the arrangment.

this year, however...

J is privy to christmas with my family!  i'll be home for 12 days, and he'll join us for 3 of those days.  the decision wasn't the problem, but the timing of everything was.  that, and J made it clear on several occasions how he was only taking part in the plan for me.  which, i will admit, is very nice, but... is it so much to ask for a little holiday spirit?

in the end, after a long conversation, i think J realized that how much this meant to me.  because truly, all i want for christmas IS him.  no matter the drama, no matter casseroles and awkward gift giving... it's about being with who you love and making a memory.  and that, we will do.